Frank Cawley
Wearin of the Green
By Frank Cawley
25, Mar 2011 - 08:00

I spent St Patrick's day 2011 in Boston, while the new Taoiseach was in the White house in Washingon DC, I was in Boston watching the annual Southie parade with a very hungover Corkman. We must have been the only men in Boston not wearing some green, even though, my compadre did turn green a couple of times in the cool new England air.

The yanks celebrate St Patrick's Day the way we used to celebrate St Patrick's Day. Everyone wears the green. At the same time you don't have to search long to see bombed out drinkers waltzing their way through the streets. "Amateur drinkers" as one Irish American guru told me.

My Grandfather used to break his Lenten abstinence from stout every St Patrick's Day. The local men of the parish would invest in a keg of Guinness, and they took it in turns drinking in one hay shed to the next. They weren't allowed to swallow a drop of hooch inside the house during the 40 days of Lent. Not even when the local padre himself, came and blessed the bounty. There was no reprieve in any house for Lent. In one way the grandfather and his wing men ended up suffering more in the long run. They had to polish off the keg in one sitting and they were in the dog house for the next three weeks if they were lucky.

Mr T

Luckily enough Mr T didn't have to search too long in his wardrobe to find some green. I asked him did he fly into Boston for the parade. He said " What you takin' about fool - you know I don't fly"

Private Ryans

This year there were two Boston parades, both taking place on Sunday the 20th of March. There was a half hour gap between the first 2 hour parade, and the second 2 minute parade. It wasn't possible to mix the two, all I can say is it would be like asking a pack of hungry Alsatians to share a handball alley with a tom cat.

The second parade is not really about celebrating Irish heritage. They aren't interested in welcoming the birth of spring. It's more of an anti establishment parade. Anti war, with a very small gay rights contingent. Boston has one of the biggest gay pride parades in the world. Which must mean the only motivation these marchers have is to wind up the people who are marching in the real parade. You see the real parade is absolutely 1000% establishment. Every second marcher is a cop or a soldier. Would be the same think if a homophobic branch of the KKK wanted to march in gay pride. That wouldn't go down well either.

Chips

These boys were clearing the way for the first parade. There were a lot of police officers, on duty. The very top of their wanted list was anyone who would be drinking water hops and barley together in an open container. No problem drinking magic mushroom poteen in a dunkin donuts container, as long as its not a can of bud light. I was talking to one member of the force, detective Lally. I asked him what do you do if you find someone one drinking this evil liquid beer. He said they would get a citation. They would have to go to the court house Monday morning, and if they don't show up, there is a warrant put out for their arrest. Jesus that's serious I said, all for a bud lite. It must be good news for Dog the bounty hunter. He asked me to guess how many tickets had he issued? I guessed....none. He smiled and waved a brand new crispy clean book of citations and said well you must have been good at the brains in school my friend.

Princess Leah

It wouldn't be a parade without the Star Wars brigade. Unfortunately I'm a heathen and I don't know one character from another. I think this is Princess Leah, obviously shes put on a few pounds since getting back to the Milky way,  probably something to do with the local cuisine, or a lighter gravitational pull from only one sun.

Bi Parade

Give a guess which parade this one was taken in?

Obi Wan

This is either Obi Wan or Brother Amedie

Ballinrobe

The Boston mounted police, got a call from the Castle Inn looking asking me ouwl anyone take a ton on horse in the outside trap.

Tony McLoughlan

Sometimes the Elvis impersonation gigs dry up, but you still crave the adoration.

John Mc Donald

Not sure if this man was lost or he's looking for a fight.... Looking for a fight in South Boston after the St Patrick's Day Parade would be the same as going into Cafollas and asking them do ye sell chips?

The dog wagging the car

The carpenters union, helping to keep high wages for professional sawmen for years.

Draft Horses

The Clydesdale, one of the favourite breeds of horses in the Castle. How could you not like a horse who wins every time.