Leisure
Tribunal Transcripts - The Board Game
By BA
25, Sep 2007 - 08:18

Only a few week's shopping to Christmas now and the toy rush is hotting up.

This year's top seller by a mile is likely to be the fantastic new game that is hotter than hot - "Tribunal Millions" ™. This is a board game which comes off-the-shelf packaged in its own imitation wall-safe which contains a sports hold-all full of notes in euro, dollar and sterling. Even though the money is fake it all looks very realistic.

Players move their tokens around the board from one so-called planning zone to another - each identified by specific colours. The zoned developed areas are squares around the margins of the board and it has lots of green space - "Sites with DEV POTENTIAL" - in the middle of the board just waiting for you to hang up your shingle.

A currency converter calculator is included in the pack. This has to be reprogrammed on a regular basis with the day's currency conversion rates - i.e. whenever a player lands on the 'currency conversion square'.

A tribunal jack-in-the-box springs open every so often to make a 'Discovery Order'* on the current player - the one unlucky enough to be throwing the dice. The unpredictable nature of the Tribunal's Jack-in-the-Box gives the game an edge. The random timer ranges from five to 30 minutes maximum. When the Jack-in-the-Box jumps up the fun starts! The game's equipment also includes ancillary items - for storage of your 'stash' it has a miniature wall safe for each player or a mini-mattress or hotel wardrobe as options for storing that stash when it is not being moved in and out of the bank. The large safe-like box in which the game is delivered also acts as The Bank.

In order to help players remember which bank they put their money in the game includes a set of labels which lets you decide which bank you want it to be - AIB, BOI, Ulster Bank. A special delux edition of the game includes Northern Rock as an option which gives the game an added piquancy with a card that forces players to queue up to withdraw all their money as there's a run on the bank! A range of cards determine the behaviour of the players should they land on particular squares - P60s, Bookie slips, hardware and house furnishing receipts are included to help in your paper trail.

The rules are incredibly complex and incredibly simple at the same time. Each player is dealt an initial mix of currencies - this is your starting 'stash' which comes to 100,000 euro. At all costs you must hide most of this from the taxman and tribunal lawyers. At all times, however, you must have either 25,000 sterling or 45,000 dollars on deposit in the legitimate bank or be able to account for exactly these amounts. The trick is to have created an accurate paper trail for all 'transactions' in order to throw the tribunal's forensic accountants off course and convince them of your honesty.

The winner of the game is the one with the biggest overall stash at the end - most of this will obviously be held in your undisclosed offshore accounts. If you are caught by the tribunal with an inaccurate audit trail or you simply get confused you are out of the game. (But you can still win even if the lawyers get you as it is the final tot that determines the overall winner.)During play it is crucial at all times no matter how much wheeling and dealing you do to make your current pot of money match the target currencies of 25,000 sterling and 45,000 dollars that the tribunal are looking for. Bear in mind that they are not looking for the rest of your stash, which is always held in your hidden offshore account. The game however is a bit easier than real life as it even has coins for those hard to match amounts so that you have an exact match no matter how the rate of exchange has changed over the course of the time. The use of coins does, however, lose you 'Credibility' points.

Each player can add to their stash in a variety of ways. The three most popular options to increase your stash are:

1. The Whiparound
- when a player lands on the Whiparound Square or has picked up a Whiparound Card he has the option to tell a sob story. Depending on how convincing the story is the other players may hand over a greater or lesser amount of cash in currencies of their choice. Getting money from other players like this may seem a bit counterintuitive but bear in mind that the other players are also trying to balance their books such that when a tribunal makes a discovery order they will be able to match 25,000 sterling or 45,000 dollars exactly with their stash on hand. The currency converter will at all times have the precise rate that must be used if the tribunal makes a discovery order. If the other players are out of balance and the tribunal jack-in-the-box hasn't sprung open for some time it may suit them to contribute a significant sum to the whiparound. As a discovery order gets more and more likely the tension builds - the maximum time the timer in the jack-in-the-box can run for is half an hour. A crucial extra feature of donating money to a whiparound is that the rules of the game then also allows them to access their offshore accounts and deposit even larger sums there.

2. The Non-Favour Favour
- when a player lands on the "No Favours Given" square he picks up a card which has details of the non-favour to be granted and how much it is worth. Depending on his 'Influence' score and how long it is since he has been at the Galway Races the player may or may not be able to grant the favour. Non Favour cards have a range of possible favours dependent on the player's ranking. Lowly favours like OPP are worth 2000 euro. Of course you must also hold the OPP card to bestow this favour. FPP is more complex - you must have garnered at least 500 influence points and have obtained the keys to relevant filing cabinet in the planning office. FPP is worth 8000.49 Euro and may be bestowed in a range of currencies including the offshore credit card which is a particularly useful tool.

3. Consultancy
The Consultancy card option allows a player holding it the option to set off the Tribunal's Jack-in-the-Box at any point in the game bringing the auditors down on top of the player currently holding the dice. Instead of setting off the discovery order, the player with the card can instead offer to be a 'Consultant' and share in the other player's ill-gotten gains - aka the LL Option.

Other popular options in the game include - "Leave the Payee Blank Please", "I Can't Remember When I Deposited It", "I Won it on the Galway Plate"

The game is very educational from a mathematical point of view with plenty of multiplying and dividing - great for kids and aspiring politicos anxious to run for the school students' union.
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* Discovery Orders
This is a key element of the game. When the Tribunal's Jack-in-the-Box springs up and hands you a "Discovery Order" as the player on the spot you must produce the evidence to show that you have in your possession the equivalent of precisely 25,000 sterling or 45,000 dollars. This money must either be in your legitimate bank account and or in your safe, mattress or hotel wardrobe - in any combination. IOUs from bookies at the Galway Races are not acceptable. Obviously all other money must be in your offshore account. Failure to produce a convincing paper trail with the correct exchange rates for the date of each transaction as determined by the currency selector will lead to you being hauled before the tribunal and having to leave the game. All outstanding favours will nonetheless be honoured and counted in your final stash when it comes to totting up the offshore account monies.

Winner Takes All!
The winner is the person with the most money when there is only one remaining player left that has not been taken to the Tribunal. Players already knocked out by the Tribunal Lawyers can still win the game because the final total is judged on your offshore accounts plus the various stashes in your hotel room wardrobe, wall safe or your mattress!
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It's a must for every Christmas Stocking this Xmas season. Get down to McDermotts toy shop now and place your order - Don't be disappointed - supply is sure to be limited.

Pat Pending in Ireland and Europe - International Pat No. 9876789

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