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Posted by Points System on October 23, 2002 at 18:54:06:
In Reply to: Re: Whats the difference between Maggie Thatcher and Edwina Currie posted by Jokes 'R Us on October 22, 2002 at 10:09:56:
A Garda pulls a Mondeo over for speeding on the Swinford bypass.
Garda: You were doing 74 mph in a 60 mile zone. May I see your driver's licence?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended for exceeding the speed limit.
Garda: May I see the registration for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I robbed it.
Garda: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the registration in the glove compartment when I was putting my gun in there.
Garda: There's a gun in the glove compartment?
Driver: Yes Sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the boot.
Garda: There's a BODY in the BOOT?!?!?
Driver: Yes, mate.
The Garda immediately calls for backup. The car was quickly surrounded by police flashing blue lights, the lot, and a Superintendent (who had come all the way from Castlebar) approached the driver to handle the tense situation:
Superintendent : Sir, can I see your licence?
Driver: Sure. Here it is. (It was valid.)
Superintendent : Whose car is this?
Driver: It's mine, Garda. Here's the registration papers. (The driver owned the car)
Superintendent : Could you slowly open your glove compartment so I can see if there's a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. (Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove compartment)
Superintendent : Would you mind opening your boot? I was told you said there's a body in it.
Driver: No problem. (Boot is opened - no body)
Superintendent : I don't understand it. The Garda who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a licence, stole the car, had a gun in the glove compartment and that there was a dead body in the boot.
Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying bastard told you I was speeding, as well.
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