In Reply to: Pints posted by Peter King on February 25, 2005 at 11:28:24:

Ask yourself the following questions!!!

1. Have you been 'on it' for more than three evenings in a row?

2. Do you regularly include 'shooters' in the evening's drinking
program?

3. Would you drink advocaat/crème de menthe if you were bored enough?

4. After trying a donner kebab for the first time have you ever had
another one?

5. Have you carried on drinking after you have vomited during the
course of the evening?

6. Have you ever lost your door keys while out drinking, shrugged, and
resigned yourself to sleeping outdoors?

7. Are you used to seeing a little white pint glass in the bottom right
corner of the screen while watching sky sports?

8. Can you play darts and/or pool to an above average standard?

9. Do you have any 'mates' whom you've met in the pub and are 30+ years
your senior?

10. Have you ever been barred or ejected?

11. Do you have any pints 'in the bin' down your local?

12. Do you 'know your limit' and usually ignore it?

13. Have you ever bought a packet of nuts/cheese and onion crisps/pork
scratchings to 'soak up some of the booze'?

14. Do you like any of the following: White Lightning, Tennents Super,
Special Brew, Skol Super, Kestrel Super, Gold Label

15. Have you ever fallen asleep in a pub/bar/club?

16. Has anyone ever refused to serve you another drink with the words
'I think you've had enough mate'?

17. Have you ever 'borrowed' a pound from a stranger because 'you've
lost your train ticket' and spent it on a tin of Spesh?

18. Have you wet your bed since you were a child?

19. Have you ever been sick in bed and left there it until morning?

20. Do you regularly awaken on a Sunday morning and have to think about
how you got home?

21. Do you tend to sleep in your clothes at weekends?

22. Has 'hair of the dog' ever taken the shakes away?

23. Is eating cheating?

24. Could you identify a single malt whisky from a blend, in a taste
test?

25. Have you ever blamed your state on 'a dodgy pint'?

26. Have you ever stood outside a pub in the cold looking at your watch
and peering through the windows before 11:00am?

27. Do the bar staff from more than two pubs know your 'usual'?

28. Have you ever taken paracetamol/used a straw in order to get drunk
faster?

29. Have you purchased MD "Mad Dog" 20/20 outside of your teens?

30. Is re-corking a bottle of wine to save it for another day out of
the question?

31. Have you ever smelt your fingers the morning after to check whether
you had a kebab the previous evening?

32. Have you ever been sent home from work with a hangover?

33. Are there any traffic cones/road signs just hanging around in your
home?

34. Do you ever awaken with mysterious cuts and bruises that you have
never seen or felt before?

35. Do you have a drink most days (5+ days per week)?

36. Have you ever been refused entry to a club for being hammered?

37. Have you ever woken up next to someone that only the phrase 'beer
goggles' could explain?

38. Do you not worry about bringing a coat out with you because you
won't feel the cold walking home?

39. Do you prefer a clapped-out unlicensed taxi driven by someone who
can barely speak english to an 'expensive' hackney carriage?

40. Have you ever pulled someone after you've vomitted?