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Should Castlebar declare itself an independent republic and become a tax fr


Posted by Kropotkin on March 29, 2013 at 09:26:11:

Should Castlebar declare itself an independent republic and become a tax free haven?

Today's poll is a weird one - but lets take a look at what would be involved.

A declaration of independence usually means a bit of a war - an emergency if you will. We have a barracks but do we have enough Uzis and Lee Enfields to end off the Athlone boys when they come trundling down the road in their armoured cars?

The blockade could last for quite a while so we'd want to stock up on Taytos and chocolate.

We'd be okay for water - the other vital ingredient for life - as long as we can control access to the sluice gates at the exit of Lough Lannagh. Of course we'd have to boil it ourselves as the Partry supply would be cut off cos we didn't pay the water bill - they wouldn't accept our new currency in payment.

We could probably grow enough spuds in back and front gardens to feed the populace over time at least. The initial stock of tinned and dried goods removed from the supermarket shelves would keep at least some of us going until the early spuds were harvested and we could make crisps again.

Of course we'd need to make some cheese and grow some onions for the flavouring. Cheese making presupposes a dairy herd within the Castlebar independent republic's city walls.

Getting the tax haven business together would mean leaving the EU and coining our own currency. Quantitative easing - we could use shells for trading - as in I will give you 40 shells for your wife. Those freshwater zebra mussels would do - are there any in Lough Lannagh?

We could ask Bill Gates and Warren Buffet to live here as part of the rural resettlement programme which was once very popular - the To Hell or to Connacht version aside. A few billionaires like that would go a long way towards attracting other inward foreign investment.


 
 
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