Posted by How's She Cuttin' on May 09, 2008 at 11:27:57:
A FEW CHUCKLES!
A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during
a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had
taken the space... Understandably, he shot her.
After stopping for a drink at a bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that
the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to
Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver
went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free
He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the
staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre
fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
Damn I like that one...
An American teenager was in the hospital yesterday recovering from
serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he
received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to
see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an
examination to determine the cause of her daughter's swollen abdomen. It
only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say, "Your daughter is
The mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor that her
daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her reputation by
having sex with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched
the horizon. The mother became enraged and screamed, "Quit looking out
the window! Aren't you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I am
paying attention ma'am. It's just that the last time this happened, a
star appeared in the East, and three wise men came. And I was hoping
that they would show up again.
When his 38-calibre revolver failed to fire at its intended victim
during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would be robber James Elliot
did something that can only inspire wonder: He peered down the barrel
and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting
machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his
insurance company. The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of
its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine out and lost a
finger. The chef's claim was approved.
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